Aje ku lana, Omo ke leni. Or however they say it. A tip e ifa, ifa ti n je. The part where he blamed me for something I didn’t exactly do or cause. The part where he said he needs to concentrate. The part where he said I should give him 6 months! And that we would still talk! I asked if he was breaking up with me, his response was, He needed time to sort out his life. He technically broke up with me! I mean, I feel his pain, but apparently no one cares about mine. He asked me if I understood, I nodded my head and my voice choked. He asked again. I said I did. I mean, I couldn’t exactly tell the truth could I? I don’t get it. I don’t know why or how his brain was thinking at that point. Apparently I had no say in this matter. But I decided to let go. I mean even if he woke up tomorrow and decided to change his mind, that I am not the reason his life isn’t going the way it is, which is wishful thinking on my part, I don’t think I would ever feel the same. I can’t. My heart just got broken again. For the fourth time. How long will I continue to care for people who did not care for me? How long will I keep loving people more than they loved me? But I will keep caring, and I’ll keep loving till I find the person who could match my pace, my pace of love. Every time I fall in love I get so sure He is the one I wanted to spend the rest of my life with. If I were a man, I would be divorced 4 times already. Because no matter how sure I am, it is never my call, and I always take a leave. At least it was peaceful this time, no accusations of being a kleptomaniac and an aristo, no evil friends in between pouring fuel in flames, no slaps, and no back and forth chats and unnecessary paying for flight fares.
This time, I am much older and I think I can handle my sh*t appropriately. And I will be alright. I know, I am going to make drastic changes to everything about me, but I like that, I can’t wait