hephes crush

 

 

My first real crush was Kabiru (for lack of a better name, I never even knew his name). He lived 5 houses away from mine, just opposite where I wait for the school bus every morning. I was in S.S.S 1 and all I knew about him was that he was a student in the University. He wasn’t so tall or imposing and seemed very approachable. He was also cute (up until the time the crush died out). He always carried his bucket to go fetch water somewhere I don’t know while I waited for the bus around 7 am. I would stare at him until the last swing of the green plastic bucket stopped coming my way and I couldn’t see any sign of him. He hardly ever looked at me and I always felt bad about it. If only he would notice me just once. Sigh. If only! But alas he did, some very many months down the line, I guess I wasn’t matured enough for him at that point. But whatever the reason was, the moment he smiled at me, the crush died. It just, died. Poof, the mushy feelings were gone. I didn’t get it. But I soon forgot about it. And years down the line I didn’t really have many crushes. It’s either I love you or I don’t, and if you don’t fall into any of these categories, well, you’re a very good friend I like so much… no, no crush for me. In fact the moment I start defining it or giving it a name and I know that name is not love, I just discard it… How about I just see how it pans out rather than pant after something I am not sure of? Emotions can’t just come this easy! How weirder can emotions just get?

We get lured by things we want but we know we cannot have or don’t even want to have, you know, the forbidden things of life, and the moment we get it, we really don’t see it as something fancy anymore, it just gets boring, very cheap, very attainable, no longer elusive. It’s the same way you spend lottery money anyhow but you won’t dare try it with your monthly pay. You see, I learned something valuable in one of my favorite animation series (I usually don’t learn a lot from it). A character said that if God did everything for us, and cured all the problems in the world, then what are we living for? We would get tired of living, no new challenges, no task, nothing! Scientists won’t task their brain to get the cure to Ebola, etc Just a bland world. We wouldn’t even pray. Or give thanks anymore, same way it doesn’t freak us to say “Thank you Lord” for the air we breathe every single time we drag in air into our nostrils. Life HAS to be a challenge!

Everyone loves challenges! Be a challenge today! Don’t be cheap! No good company would give a serious thought to that guy they interviewed who didn’t even bother negotiating the amount they offered. No girl would want a guy who doesn’t challenge her intellects and all he talks about is football and Nigerian music (no offense), and no guy would want a girl who didn’t guard her heart with all diligence by putting up some walls or having some principles, this is not saying you should play hard to get unnecessarily, this is saying, know where to toe the line of being easy or being hard.

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